Find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

"Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the LORD; He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; He is my God, and I trust Him. For He will rescue you from every trap and protect you from deadly disease. He will cover you with His feathers. He will shelter you with His wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection. Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night, nor the arrow that flies in the day. Do not dread the disease that stalks in darkness, nor the disaster that strikes at midday. Though a thousand fall at your side, though ten thousand are dying around you, these evils will not touch you. Just open your eyes and see how the wicked are punished. 

If you make the LORD your refuge, if you will make the Most High your shelter, no evil will conquer you, no plague will come near your home. For He will protect you wherever you go. They will hold you up with their hands so you won't even hurt your foot on a stone. You will trample upon lions and cobras; you will crush fierce lions and serpents under your feet!

The LORD says, 'I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue and honor them. I will reward them with a long life and give them my salvation.'" Psalm 91

 Have you ever just stopped and thought about how faithful God is? For most of us, the answer to that question is yes. Have you ever thought about His faithfulness when you're in the middle of a situation where you have absolutely no idea what to do or how things will turn out? Yeahhhh that's a little tougher.... 

I'm gonna be honest. This semester is proving to be really hard for me. I'm not talking about my classes, though those are challenging. I'm just talking about life in general. I realllllly just want to be back in North Carolina with my family more than anything right now. I know that God wants me where I am though. I'm not sure what I am supposed to be doing besides school but I know He has a plan. Jeremiah 29:11 tells me that clearly. It's just frustrating not knowing what to do. I feel like I lack purpose. And for anyone who knows me, you know that I need to feel like I have a purpose for being here. I need to be needed.

Another hard aspect is that I am So. Lonely. All the time. I miss my family. I miss my friends from my hall from last year. Even though most of us are still here, it's not the same being off campus. I feel a lack of connection. Living on a hall, you can kind of take it for granted that you have people around all the time. Living off campus shows you really quickly just how lonely life can be. I mean, I have 4 roommates and a cat, but my roommates and I all have really different schedules and I don't want to be a cat lady so.... yeah... it get's lonely. But you know what? Within my loneliness, I am learning. I'm learning to know God and trust that He is sufficient for anything I could ever need in life. He is drawing me closer to Him in ways that I couldn't have ever imagined. I am learning every day just how awesome the God of the universe is.

I can't even begin to explain how thankful I am that God got a hold of my life and my heart. I honestly have no doubts that I wouldn't be here if He hadn't woken me up. I was at a point where I was so desperate to feel something that if I didn't get to a point where I felt alive that I was ready to end it all. It's true when people say that Jesus radically changes lives. The change I have seen in my life is proof enough for me. So while I may not really be content right now, I know this unrest is here for a reason. Maybe He is getting me ready to move forward to something that I never imagined. Or maybe He is wanting to show me something I need to let go of so He isn't letting me settle until it's gone. All I know is that I have to continue to pray and seek His will.

So I guess this post is mainly to ask you all to pray for me. Pray that I stay on the path He has in store for me and that I won't stray off on my own. 
Maybe you're dealing with something similar. Maybe He pushed me to post this to be an encouragement that you are not alone. 
As always, if any of you ever need me to pray for you, or if you just need a friend, know that I am always here.

I love you all.

Jesus loves you more.

Kati

Just as a warning.

Uplands Reach. More commonly known as URCC.... Some of the kids from my church are there this week for Junior Camp. I guess some people have good memories of that place... I don't. All I remember is the favoritism shown toward some kids and the sense of not being good enough poured over others. I was, unfortunately, one of the ones who never felt good enough to be there. The last time I was there, I could count on one hand the number of people who actually even spoke to me... and that's including the so called "leaders" of that place.
The favoritism, as much of a problem as it is, is not my biggest beef with the place. I am a firm believer that God calls people to His salvation. You can't be scared into it through the hellfire and brimstone preaching. I'm sorry but that just doesn't work. I know that from my own experience. I thought I was "saved" when I was 14 at Teen Camp, but I was wrong. Very wrong. I know that the Word must be taught, but please, find a way to not make it terrifying. Preaching the stuff that "If you don't get saved tonight, you might die and spend eternity in the flames of hell." don't you think that's enough to make all those kids up there get "saved"? From my own life, I can tell you that that kind of "salvation" isn't real. At least it wasn't for me. The "camp high" lasted for like a week but there was no real change. For me, real salvation came when I was 19. Ironically, when a guest group from Uplands Reach was at my church. While I like the people as people, I have zero respect for the camp itself. It screwed up my understanding of what a relationship with Jesus really is.

So for those of you who go to/support/work at the camp, be wary. Pay attention. But ultimately that's your decision. I'm just stating my experience and opinions.

This is not meant to offend. Just meant to warn.

Sometimes life is hard

I've been thinking today about how very blessed I am. 

It's been a really hard day, not gonna lie. But beyond the hard stuff, I have such a blessed life. I have parents who love me. My sister and her husband are my best friends. Outside of my family, I have  most amazing friends I could ask for. The ones who are deeply involved in my life all share the same values and same core beliefs. We encourage each other and always push each other to dig deeper into our faith. 
Yes, I have been cut off by someone who I love very much. It hurts... a lot. But God knows what He's doing. His strength is made perfect in my weakness. His grace is sufficient for me. So even though I am hurting and I have honestly cried a lot today, ultimately, God has a plan. I just have to have the faith to trust Him. I hate asking for help, but I could really use some friends in my life right now. I just need my loved ones to rally around me and encourage me when I am doing the right thing and hold me accountable when I stumble. So please, if you are one of my dear ones, just let me know that you're here.

I love you all.

Those who dwell in the shadow of the Almighty find rest in the shelter of the Most High. -Psalm 91:1

loved ones lost

By the title of this you'd probably think someone died.....

I honestly feel like a part of me has.

The person I have been best friends with for 3 or 4 years won't talk to me anymore.
I had a feeling this would happen. I knew it would hurt but I couldn't imagine this kind of intense pain.

I knew when I started taking my faith seriously that I would lose friends. It's a cost I was, and still am willing to pay. It's worth it. But that doesn't make it hurt any less. I have been crying for a while now and I don't see these tears stopping any time soon.

When you invest your time and life in someone and you trust them and they trust you with things that a lot of other people don't know, only to have that person abandon you because of differences in beliefs. It hurts. Realllllly bad.

I don't know if this friendship is over for just a while or forever. But I can promise that it's a friendship that I will never forget. I love all of my friends equally. No matter what lifestyle they live, what political party they follow, or what they do or don't believe. I was not placed in this world to judge. I'm here to love.

To my friend:  You know who you are. I don't know if you will ever read this or if you even care what I have to say anymore. But if there's one thing I want you to know, it's that I love you and I will never stop loving you and praying for you.

²  Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, ³ for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. ⁴ And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

⁵  If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. ⁶ But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind.   -James 1:2-6



But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. -2 Corinthians 12:9

 

Settle My Soul

Oh, this aching in my soul. This burning desire for companionship. God, why have you kept me single? Why are You waiting to send that one for whom my heart desires my way? I see my friends who are my age in happy, serious relationships, some getting engaged, and some getting married. What about me? Do You have someone out there for me?
  God, I would settle for just a close friend. Someone with whom I could pour my heart out too. You know my heart and You know my trust issues. God, You know that sometimes I even have a hard time trusting You, even though I know that You are the only One who will never abandon me.
  Abba, I am so lonely. You have seen the tears that I cry. You have heard my desperate thoughts. You have felt my pain when I see my friends and then am reminded that I am alone. God, please make me content. I say that I am okay with my life but You know that I yearn for so much more. Settle my soul, Jesus. Be my Jehovah Shalom. I need peace so much right now. God, I just want to be where You want me  to be. Please, just be my comfort. Be my rest. Be my friend.
-Your daughter

To the one for whom my soul desires,

   If you exist, know that I love you. More than anything, I want to be by your side to be your one and only. I want to be your other half. I want to be your bride. If you're out there, I am dreaming of the day I meet you. If you are feeling the loneliness that I feel, I pray that God will comfort you as well. He will bring us together when the time is right.

-Your future bride

Let me set this straight.

Just so you know that I am not ignorant.


Amendment One states " Marriage between one man and one woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized in this State. This Section does not prohibit a private party from entering into contracts with another private party; nor does this section prohibit courts from adjudicating the rights of private parties pursuant to such contracts."

The definition of marriage in federal law is the "[l]egal union of one man and one woman as husband and wife." Blacks Law Dictionary 876 (5th edition 1979). The word "domestic" was added to the words "legal union" to clarify that other legal arrangements, such as business partnerships, would not be affected.

Legally recognizing only heterosexual marriage isn't discrimination against homosexuals wanting to marry. Marriage between a man and a woman has existed in virtually every known society. It has served the purpose of channeling procreative sexual activity into an institution that will provide a stable environment for children produced from the sexual union of the partners in marriage. Same sex marriage is an entirely different relationship with an entirely different purpose. Expanding the marital institution to other relationships which serve completely different purposes ultimately undermines the institution which has proven to be the best and safest environment for children.

The amendment will not nullify medical powers of attorney, wills, and trusts if the parties are homosexual partners.
Under G.S. 32A-18 "any competent person who is not engaged in providing health care to the principal for renumeration, and who is 18 years of age or older, may act as a health care agent."  The relationship between the patient and the designated agent does not matter. The amendment explicitly states that it will not affect the rights of parties to enter into private contractual agreements.

The marriage amendment will not determine the custody and visitation rights of unmarried parents unless their behavior affects the child. Custody orders are based on the "parent"/child relationship, not on the domestic relationship between the "parents". Courts have based custody and visitation on the "best interest of the child". NCGS 50-13.2(2007) The sexual behavior of the party petitioning for custody or visitation is not determinative except as it affects the child. The "de facto parenting doctrine" was applied in 2010 in Boseman v. Jarrell. The Supreme Court refused to allow adoption to an unmarried same sex partner but did award joint custody and visitation rights to that non-biological same sex partner who had become a de facto parent to the child.

The marriage amendment will not affect domestic violence laws. Opponents would have you thing that the amendment obliterates our domestic violence law. The cases they use as authority are Ohio appellate cases later overturned by the Ohio Supreme Court which found the domestic violence statuses consistent with the state's marriage amendment. In Kansas the outcome was the same. Marriage amendments have had no effect on the enforcement of domestic violence statutes. 30 other states have marriage amendments. In all 30 states domestic violence laws continue to be enforced. I have read and reread the North Carolina domestic violence statutes. I am unable to even comprehend the logic of this objection.


The truth is, there is a real threat to the institution of marriage.
In several states same sex marriage has been imposed upon the people by courts that have engaged in tortured judicial reasoning - Massachusetts and Iowa for example. These courts have used the state constitutions to reverse the very pro marriage policies that were in effect when the state constitution was adopted.

Now it has come to North Carolina. Same sex couples in Asheville went to the courthouse for two weeks last fall seeking to obtain marriage licenses. A lawsuit was filed by the Register of Deeds of Guilford County in December challenging our state's marriage laws and asking the court to declare them unconstitutional because they don't allow same sex partners to "marry".

This marriage amendment will ensure that marriage between one man and one woman will be protected from result-oriented judges.

Grace. Love. Mercy. Kindness.

Matthew 5:43-48 "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be children of your Father who is in heaven. For He makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward will you, what reward will you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect."

Luke 6:27-36  "But I say to you who hear. Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. To the one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from the one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either. Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your good do not demand them back. And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them. If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons and daughters of the Most High, for He is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful."

Romans 12:9-21  "Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in showing zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Repay no evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written 'Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord." To the contrary, 'If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by doing so you will heap burning coals on his head.' Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."

Jesus, help me to show love to those who are unloving to me. Help, me show mercy and kindness when I receive none. Give me patience. Overwhelm me with Your love so that it overflows to those around me. I can't do this apart from you Abba.